If you’re working with a therapist, you can seek help figuring out how to self-validate, and the question I find most helpful is: How does it make sense that I’m feeling this emotion right now?
It takes a lot of skill and training to operate the many dials and buttons and adjust based on the various dials and gauges.
Emotion vulnerability can leave you feeling out of control of your emotions, thoughts, and actions.
You might feel consumed by your emotions and unable to see out of them. Marsha Linehan has described, people with high emotion vulnerability can be like emotional burn victims, sensitive to the slightest touch (Linehan, 1993a).
If you’re dealing with strong emotion vulnerability, you can get to the point where you are able to step back (even at high speeds and in turbulent conditions), observe and notice how you’re feeling, and accept, experience, or regulate your emotions.
Regarding self-invalidation, I think of this as much like a well-worn path in the woods.